Mundane …….

I have been taking count,
Of how I feel each day,
In this month of May

Walking the same path,
That leads back to home, the same way
Leaving my feeling hanging, on a back road
I have lost all counts,
Waiting for my feelings to decode

I have been building a wall on a wall
For so long, so hard to break through
I need to learn how to build a door,
But I have no clue, how to?

Everyone want something more
But I want everything a bit less
Which means less stress,
In this life fast paced

It’s difficult to open-up
To someone I want to
As I cope with something inside me
That causes a major hold-up

So I watch the moon, every night
To see how it fights
With seclusion around

But it seems, moon has given up
As it uses someone else’s light

In spite, losing a fight
it’s beautiful
How it stands alone
Inspire me to write
In a lonely sleepless night

Rainbow like ……

A girl with her hair tied up
Would sit near window with a coffee mug
Vapors would rise and rest on the surface
She would draw smileys on it
Coz they were the only friend she knew
Often missed someone but never knew who?
A father to protect or lover to love?
As she would sometimes fight with random blues
She would watch a falling leaf till the end
As it rests among the others which were dead
She would stare at it, until her eyes
Would give-up and blackout
Not knowing which was the one she gazed
With every sip, her eyes would close
May be caffeine would give her high
Relaxing her from many goodbyes
She had a tattoo carved
Of angel wings on her spine
They would get real, upon closing her eyes
Tempting her to fly high
She would find herself
Among the passing clouds
In deep blue sky
Calling for stars that would hide
May be her loneliness was her pride
As she would paint her soul
And conceal her fears
With colors rainbow like

 

There seems to be a dotted line connecting our soul

It isn’t free like a highway

But there is a certain place in my heart it holds

We are too busy in our lives, to feel it or see it through

Only our vibes would agree, on the fact that it is true

 

It’s intimidating and amusing at the same time

When you know someone has all your attention

Gripping me with reins to guide my every movement

 

Holding on is a bad choice for my mind, coz it’s already wrecked

Letting go is not ideal for my heart coz it’s like an open door

Feels like juggling on one leg on the rope

 

Only thing I know when I am in love, is to love

But that’s never enough, said the wiser world

There is more to it, they repeat

What’s more? Is never to be revealed

And as they say,

Sometimes it just clever to hope

 

A fainted pain

A fainted pain, said hello
Said, I remember you
from long ago
How’s your scars?
Have they healed?
Do you live
In the wrecked house you built
Painting it red, with your guilt

I see, you still have
that broken mirror
Does it remind you, of someone
Or makes you feel better
There is something broken too
than yourself, my dear

I see a hollow, still remains
On your windowpane
Whistling sound of fear
blown by wind in the rain

How does it feel, to be blamed
By the inner demons you tamed
For feelings that were chained
So I guess, it’s the same
You still out of your game
A fainted pain, said hello

Road Ahead ….

Illusion seems soothing
Reality feels confusing
Is a feeling, I feel
As I walk the wicked street
What’s amusing? Is a little something
Hitting my ears,
Like a sweet sound of wind
Oh! And that fear creeps in
Feels like a warning
Take a step back, it whispers
As I look around, it disappears
What should I do? Asks my hesitance
Keep moving on or take a step back?
Mystery ahead, seems to be lending something
A helping hand it seems
Trust me! It sings
Free you mind, be a wandering soul
Let’s stroll through the unknowns
Mount the mazy hill
Use your wits
To pass through those twists
And see for yourself, what’s in the end
A foe or a friend to be with

He said She said III……

She: When do you know, you like someone?

He: Do you mean love someone?

She: Yes but first it starts with liking, right?

He: No, Don’t we like everyone around us? Imagine if we didn’t, it would be a mess

She: Ok Ok, When do you know, you love someone?
He: (when you hold my hand!! but I can’t tell her that)……. It’s about how you feel, when you are with that person…

She : Feelings !! What kind?

He: A feeling that makes you forget all your problems, insecurities, distrust feelings, fear of future … all that kinda stuffs…Negative Negative kinds

She: But there are many close ones who make me feel that way

He: soooo that means you love them all … 😀

She: No No … I mean not like that…I mean someone who is perfect for me …a guy whom I can be with my entire life …. A happy loving life

He : ohh !! A Guy (Shit!! Now I need to know where I stand) It’s the same feelings but with a twist …

She : Twist ?

He : Always go for A loving life and not a happy loving life ? 1st. don’t base your happiness on others, I know it’s difficult but sooner you learn better for you 2nd. You can’t control him and certainly he can’t control you. It’s like an awesome magnetic attraction but with a bit of space and less attachment..

She: You are not helping!!!!

He : ( It’s me !!! dam it ) OK Ok I will break it down for you
Someone who manages to give you enough confidence that in spite of all your problems, insecurities, failures, distrust feelings, fear of future which will always be there – he will stand by you
Not necessarily will always solve your problems coz that’s your shit and you need to deal with it…. but you know that he will be with you shoulder to shoulder through thick and thin … no matter how bad his situation is …

She: but

He: ( Ohh I hate that BUT )

She: There are many guy friends who are close to me and I know they will stand by my side

He: (That is probably coz ……… they have all fallen for you…..Shit !!! competition competition !!!! ) Hmmm , out of those guys whom do you want to be by your side the most ? Someone you pour your heart out and feel empty …..Someone who can console and be straight-up at the same time …..
Someone who respects and reminds you of who you are …..

She: hmmm

He: (And someone who takes time to answer all kind of shitty questions and still suggest someone else but not him)….😊😊

Her eyes…

Her eyes could speak
A thousand words, in a blink
Her depth so scary
Yet
an attraction to seek
And
If you dare to plunge in deep
Be ready to loose yourself
It’s the only way in
Swim through her tears
Pass by
her floating fears
And
If you find a way, in her darkness
Or a passage to fit in
Rest for a while, it isn’t a sin
As it’s yet to be seen
who dwells in her for long
The one who belongs
Sensing
There’s s no way to leave